My Malfunctioning "Filter"

Some people deal with OCD, others struggle with ADD, etc.  I, on the other hand, suffer from S.B.T.  "Speak  Before Thinking" disorder.  When my brain forms a thought, it's supposed to filter that thought before it reaches my mouth.  However, periodically, my filtering system malfunctions.   Over the years I have noted that most men I know also suffer from this disorder, but God was kind enough to create a kind of "substitute" filter.  It's called WOMAN. 

Most of the time, my wife is quite capable of filtering those thoughts with a simple look.  Her eyes work like the "pause" button on a TV remote that, when she senses I 'm having a thought that's going to come out incorrectly, she simply uses a look to trigger the complete paralysis of my mouth. 

Case in point: My son and I were discussing the advantages of temporarily bringing home animals from his class such as snakes, bearded dragons, chinchillas, etc. as a favor to the teacher over the holidays.  My wife quickly realized that my intent was to have my son bring home what I considered to be the "cool" animals. She, with one look, was able to turn my mouth off and "help me" to understand that discussing the bringing home of said animals (which had not gone through the proper approval process) was not an option.

On the other hand, the filter and shut-down mechanisms are not always intended to be JUST for her advantage; she has, quite often, stopped me from choking to death on my own foot.  She can't be around me 24/7, but when I get home and describe my day to her, she is very skilled at removing my foot from my mouth so that I can try, try again!

Pro 13:3

The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; The one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.

1Cor 11:9

...for indeed man was not created for the woman's sake, but woman for the man's sake.